So here we are, this is 30 years of marriage. For better or worse, in sickness and health, 30 years.
I think about us 30 years ago, standing at the altar making promises to each other and to God. I think we thought we knew and understood what we were committing to and signing up for, but 30 years later, as I reflect, I don’t think we had a clue or could comprehend the depth of those vows.
I learned some time ago that, 8, 10, 15 years into marriage you realize love is a choice. You wake up everyday and you choose to love this person you made a covenant with – a covenant made before a Holy God. You choose to love their imperfections and flaws, weaknesses and struggles. You wake up every morning and choose to stay in this partnership because it is not about you. It is not about your feelings and “happiness” it is about this promise. I got lucky. He made it easy. And in every aspect of covenant, it is pretty freaking awesome.
No two people are the same some 30 years later. People change. They develop new interests and passions. Their character is shaped and redefined. It happened to us. We are no longer those young people standing before God, our families and an audience as we began our journey. We’re different, and it’s good.
The story of us is this, our marriage has been beautifully hard, wonderfully painful, tearfully joyous, tenderly tried, and stressfully exciting. But what has kept us together is solely our commitment to Jesus. Our walks haven’t always been perfect and the foundation is filled with cracks, but we have a Savior who fights relentlessly for us as we fight for each other and this family.
I’ve known you since I was 17. I dated you for five years. I’ve been married to you for 30. We’ve raised three men (pretty freaking amazing men). We’ve been in ministry for over 25 years. It’s been a wild ride! But through it all, I have watched you evolve from this pretty great guy to an amazing, wonderful, humble, gentle, spirit-filled man who treasures me. After being with you for over three decades I can honestly say that over the past 4 years I have seen the best version of you emerge.
Some cynicism with many women in this modern day culture revolves around a passage of scripture that says wives submit to your husbands…. But the verses after that say husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and laid His life down for her.. What a charge for men. What a huge responsibility of love and commitment. You do that every single day of our life. With a guy like that by my side, why would I not want to submit?
I’ve learned the antidote to a successful marriage. Ladies, find a man who will love Jesus more deeply, passionately and fervently than he loves you, and you will be on the ride of your life.
Thanks for doing life with me. Happy 30th. Shall we go another round?